Would You Believe Me if I Said...

Would you believe me if I said I was never sad, never had bad moods, or had never had a fight with my husband? 

Would you believe me if I said I never got lonesome or wished I had more friends?

And what if I said I'd never embarrassed myself, felt foolish, or wished I could do it all over again?

Would you believe me  if I said that I liked everyone and had never gossiped or had a bad thought?

And would you believe me if I said I never complained about anything like ice on the streets, boredom, hunger, being too warm or thirsty?

What  if I said  that hot flashes had never made me miserable...that I never worried about my hair and didn't care a whittle about what others thought or that my feelings were never hurt? 

Or how about my saying that my house was always clean with windows that sparkled and a toilet so white it squeaked. 

Would you believe me if I said there were no dust balls under the bed or that I still looked perfect at midnight when I laid my head down on the pillow? 

How about my saying that I said I fixed my husband a fully cooked meal three times a day and made desserts twice a week?

Just wondering what you would say or do if I said that all of these were true or said that even one of these was true of me?